Taking back control

Sometimes it’s not easy to see when you are struggling, other times it’s clear. Even on those occasions when it is clear you are struggling it can be easier to bury your head in the sand.

I almost made that mistake recently. I had been trying to do too much and was clearly struggling. I was trying to work full time on a very busy environment as well as studying full time and still maintaining family commitments. It was impossible to do it all and I found that my anxiety levels were so high I couldn’t function.

It was a huge decision but I also know it’s definitely the right one and I feel better that I am able to dedicate my time to one thing at a time

I felt that there was no one who cared about how I was feeling (I do know that there are so many people who care). Still I was struggling and knew that something had to give. So I made the mature decision to give up one of the modules I was studying, I can pick it back up again on October so all it means is my dreams are a little bit further away. It also means that my current workplace get to put up with me for even longer unless I run away to join the circus 🎪.

This is by far the best decision I have made and while there were a few people who were worried that I would stop me finishing my degree or make me feel worse it honestly hasn’t. Although when thinking about it all I did for a short while think I was a failure but, I know that this is the best choice and I need to take smaller steps to be able to manage myself.

So all in all it’s a good thing to do something when you are struggling it can be for the best.

As always stay safe and look after each other.