What is happiness?

One of the things I have found since starting to accept myself and everything that comes with me is wondering what true happiness is. I know that this looks different for everybody and what brings one person happiness may bring another person sadness.

For years I never thought I’d find anything that brought me anywhere close to happiness and I flitted from job to job in the hope that it would bring me some form of happiness. It didn’t all it did was serve as a distraction from my life. Although we are almost six years into my current job and while some days I would rather be living in a cottage in the countryside I know that my job brings something close to happiness most of the time. It’s not many places that I look forward to going to each day, except maybe the last few weeks of the last term but there are reasons for that.

Personally while I still have not found happiness I am more accepting that although my family situation is not ideal and causes great deals of stress and it is not permanent I just need to be more patient with saving and being able to move out. I also know that some people will like and accept me for who I am, while others do not accept this and will strive to cause me to feel uncomfortable with who I am.

While I now know that I want nothing more than to find love and happiness I also know that this may take a while. Also this is not how I planned for my life to be. There was a time when my life plans were to marry and escape my life and to travel around in an old VW camper van 🚐 with my husband and children. I also planned to be teaching long before now. But, if that had happened I would not have met some amazing people who seem to be there no matter what and are like having personal cheerleaders when needed and remind me frequently that even when I say I can’t do something I actually can I just need a bit more self belief.

So for now happiness is hit and miss but I am determined that I will find it. Even though I live with a younger sister who is convinced everyone is a serial killer and demands to know where I am at all times which still has an impact on nights out as she constantly messages which means I do not enjoy myself.

One day I will live in my cottage with my VW outside and be working in a little school as a teacher.

So I leave you all with the question what does happiness mean to you and how did you find it.

Take care and love always 💕❤️