When the struggle is a lot.

So it’s not even 6am and I’m already filled with dread for the day and I don’t even know why. For the first time in a very long time I’m not even sure that I want to face work today (I’m sure I’ll be fine once I get there) I’m not sure if it’s a combination of things; the easing of covid restrictions although amazing still has me running a bit scared, it could be that half term is in sight and I like so many others is just dragging through until the end of the week. My hip and knee are also playing up which is setting of my sciatica (usually when it’s this bad I’d be at the gp but they would be signing me off and when places are short staffed there’s no way I could leave people in the lurch, so I will just need to hold on for a few more days).

That constant anxious feeling and the feeling that I’m just going in circles in life is there too. Although this always appears around the time of my birthday and while I know comparing my life to the lives of others is really stupid my brain has decided that this is a great idea and is leaving me feeling like a bit of a failure.

Sorry for the waffling post and it’s not a poor me post I just need to get these feelings out of not they will completely overwhelm me.

As always stay safe and look after each other.