Piggy in the middle.

I honestly do not even know how to put this one into words. But I always feel like piggy in the middle between my youngest sister and my mum. Both are as bad as each other when it comes to their moods and neither can see that they are both the same.

My mother likes everybody to talk to her or rather pay attention to her she just talks and no-one gets a word in edge ways. She has always been like this and after my dad left this became even worse as she just said how his being violent affected her. It didn’t matter about anyone else as long as people were asking about her. This often leaves me with the thought of if she hadn’t been pregnant with me she would not have married him and none of this would have happened.

We do not know how much she lies about her medical conditions as we are not with her when she goes to the doctors. But I can say that no matter how ill you are she has had worse or suddenly is ill. The worst of which has been recently when she said to me that she had something wrong with her liver and needed me to pick up her prescription. She then told my youngest sister that she had something wrong with her lungs. The medication was for neither and were sleeping tablets. This has lead to my youngest sister being very angry which is fine except that she makes awful comments all of the time and says it’s my fault as I have enabled my mother to lie.

My youngest sister has anxiety and my mother has depression so both can be very selfish and not see how their attitudes affect those around them. Both are never in the wrong yet those around them are always wrong.

I have always tried to be the peacekeeper between them both yet I am the one who always ends up being made to feel we wrong. People have always said to me that I have to be strong for everyone else and this has definitely resulted in being somewhat desensitised to a lot. I rarely cry as it is seen as a sign of weakness.